ROB SHERMAN:
Preparing to Crush a Home-Run!
The Spin-Offs battled their way to victory last night in the shadow ofthe Washington Monument. Our heroes (15 strong) dominated the first three innings, holding a 4-1 lead over their opponent, Recession Secession ("RC"). However, by RC's final at-bat in the top of the seventh and final inning, the opponent had clawed its way back to tie the game at 12-12. The Spin-Offs, with hope in their eyes, watched their first-baseman, ROB SHERMAN step to the plate - and smash a ball to deep left field! (See attached picture.) Rob was rounding second by the time the opponent's fielder laid hands on the ball. Thinking he had a triple, Rob paused at third - only to see that the fielder had overthrown the cut-off man! To the delight of Rob's teammates he dashed for home and scored - breaking the tie and clinching the Spin-Offs' first win! Rob was unanimously voted GAME MVP for his role in the victory.
(MVP - RUNNER UP) In related news, JOE DERRIGO was named Runner-Up forMVP. During a third inning play, Joe dove into third base to avoid the tag. However, the play was so close that the third base umpire was left scratching his head. Section 191.34(a)(2) of the Official League Rules ("OLRs") specify that "When a play at third base is too close to be called by the umpire at said base, the decision shall be made by one of the following methods: (i) A drinking contest between the fielder and the base-runner; (ii) A pistol-duel between the fielder and base-runner; or (iii) paper-rock-scissors."
Joe, still feeling the effects of a late three-martini lunch, and being freshly out of pistol ammunition, wisely chose the paper-rock-scissors method of settling the dispute. After winning the first round (scissors beat paper), Lady Luck intervened with a hilarious twist of fate which saw the next five rounds resulting in tie after tie. Finally, despite Joe's heroic efforts, his rock was beat by paper and then his paper was beat by rock. He was out. Nonetheless, despite the loss this was easily the most amusing play ofthe game! Good effort Joe!
(HONORABLE MENTIONS) In other news, Honorable Mentions go to BRUISER (aka DURRE ISASA) who stuck it out the entire game despite the pain; JAMES DAVIS who, in order to play last night risked a long drive home in bad weather; KEVIN AWESOME (aka KEVIN ALSOP) who stayed to the end even though he had planned on leaving early for a prior engagement; ANDY MUIR, who is just an all-around cool guy, & JACQUELINE PINO, who came up with a clever Spin-Off's cheer.
(SPECIAL THANKS) Special Thanks go to CURTIS TROY for donating a custom-made measuring tool that determines the length of the basepaths and distance to the pitcher's mound. Thanks too to JOHN GULISANO, who kindly offered to keep score for the latter four innings, freeing me to relax a little and enjoy the game!
(WELCOME) A warm welcome to the new additions to the Spin-Offs: MARQUIS BRANTLEY & JESSICA NAVARRETE, both of whom played with distinction last night. Belated welcome to CLAUDIO BARTOLUCCI & JOHN RAY. (Apologies for the delay gentlemen!)
(MISC) Someone left a blue umbrella at the field. The other team has it. Let me know if it's yours.
(NEXT GAME) The next game is Thursday June 4th against the Jolly Rogers (0-2).
Enjoy your weekend Spin-Offs - and as always, HAIL CESAR! (COLLANTES ;)
-M
